You know how it's 99% disgusting to throw-up? It stinks, burns, splashes everywhere, makes your eyes water, and cramps up your stomach muscles. BUT, there is the 1%. That far corner of your mind that you don't want to admit is there in the middle of your five alarm fire of hot mess. It is the part that is enjoying the vomiting process. Hopefully, my blog is that 1% .

Friday, December 25, 2009

Merry Christmas my Ass

December 25, 1981

Dear Santa,

Well, burned again! I guess you didn’t get the letter I sent. Or the last 8 either. I am not exactly sure what I’m doing wrong. I have tried soooo hard to be a good little boy but bupkis again. Even that bully Timmy next door got a brand new Atari VCS. I try to not question your motives but even at 11 years old I still believe in you and hold out hope each Christmas that I will make your list.

Please don’t forget me again next year!

Gregory Mitchell
11 years old

December 26, 1981

Dear Gregory,

Thank you very much for the letter. Fuck off you little Jew-boy, you get shit!


1 comment:

  1. December 25, 1981

    Dear Santa,

    All I want this Christmas is for the jews to not get anything.

    John Banks
    6 years old